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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

It is really not necessary nor is it part of any social contract that you have to reciprocate every invitation.  
  
 [/quote]

What a strawman argument. No one is arguing that every invitation should be reciprocated. We’re talking about relationships, not single events. [/quote]

Can you give me an example then?  OP said that she had known people for a decade and had them over a few dozen times.  That sounds to me like neighbors that you invite to a yearly Christmas party and occasional backyard BBQ.

If this isn’t what you are talking about, then what are you talking about?  
[/quote]

NP but it’s not possible to synthesize it into a logical if-then statement. It’s more of a general feeling like “hey, I’m putting effort into this relationship, the other person seems disinterested, let me slow fade”.

Here are some examples:

I invite neighbors to our yearly holiday gathering and don’t expect any reciprocation other than friendly interactions when I run into them around town. If I noticed a neighbor was consistently walking by me and not taking a second to chit-chat, then you know what? I may drop them from the invite list next year. Probably no skin off their nose.

We have formerly close friends whom we used to see frequently during Covid, but it started to feel like we were always doing the inviting or initiating, even though there was no structural reason they couldn’t. They also flaked on us once or twice, which made our kids sad. So we cut down the invitations to only large events. I think they are just not planners - our common friends see them even less than we do.

On the other hand, I have a close friend from work whose home I have never been invited to because it is (in her words) small and not guest-friendly. However, she helps me a ton when I host, like a sister. And she initiates park playdates with the kids, and lunches and mani-pedis with me.[/quote]

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