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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wonder when parents like OP will understand that they are sending the message that their kids are incompetent and need mommy to “do more” for them and take charge. It is a main reason (along with social media) for the rise in teen and youth anxiety and mental health issues. 
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This should be shouted from the rooftops. Parents come in and save their kids from the slightest repercussion of their actions at every turn. [/quote]

That doesn't apply to a huge decision like this one. I always wonder who people making these sorts of comments are.[/quote]
+1 certain natural consequences are fine.  Life altering ones, not so much.[/quote]

Life-altering: college v. no college
Life-effecting: this good college v. that good college v. might be a better college for your current major

Parent intervention for the first is quite reasonable. For the second, really not that critical.[/quote]

Back away and let her make the choices.

For all of our kids, we made sure they made the final choices and we didn't give indications of what "our personal top choices were" Why?  Because it's not our journey---we wanted our kids to pick their college choice from their list of acceptances.  Because they have to be excited about the 4 years there.  If issues arise (and they will every freshman has some issue/regrets), I wanted our kids to not "blame us for making them attend that school".  They need to own their decisions.

Turns out both worked out well.  And yes, both had some challenges freshman year as every kid does.  Moving 2-3K miles from home, living in a shared dorm room, managing college courses is new and different.  But they picked the right place for them, and were motivated to struggle thru and find solutions largely because they picked it (not mommy & daddy). It's their college experience, our only input as parents ultimately is "we can afford to pay $X per year" beyond that it's up to them
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