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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You're saying no to everything your sister proposes. So what plan do you actually think is good? If you want to protect your relationship with your sister, come to the table with something other than "no no no, me me me".[/quote]

What? No! The OP does not need to forego her family’s financial well being to buy her mother a condo.

OP all you can do is set the boundary and be clear what you can or can’t do. Sadly, you can’t control how others react. It’s not your sisters place to determine what your family should sacrifice for your mother. [/quote]

Of course she doesn't. But if she wants a good relationship with her sister, then she needs a problem-solving attitude and should propose something that is realistic that she will be comfortable with. Shooting down the sister's ideas and offering no constructive input will damage the sibling relationship.

[/quote]

Agreed. You can have it both ways. You can't refuse to meaningfully help then expect the sister relationship to go undamaged.[/quote]

It's already damaged, because apparently the sister is a toxic narcissist.  Did you completely miss the part where OP is dealing with cancer treatments?  The mom has assets, an active lifestyle, a partner, and a relatively minor injury.  The OP has cancer with apparently a not-great prognosis.  The OP is much more in crisis mode and much more in need of help than the mom.  Only a toxic person would start whining at a cancer patient that they're not helping enough.  Only morons on dcum would feel the need to shame a cancer patient for "refusing to meaningfully help" with a relatively minor injury.  What's wrong with you, PP?[/quote]

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