Reply to What's the best elder model to unburden our own children

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "What's the best elder model to unburden our own children"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom complained that my grandpa who died at 94 in his SFH did not close down his SFH earlier and move to senior living earlier.

Guess who is 83 and just reinvested $50K in making her house and backyard more liveable (long overdue, and may be partially recouped at resale, but still!)?  I asked her to move to my state but she refused.

I think the reason for the freezing is that they don't want to live in living arrangements they wouldn't otherwise choose.

I love the idea of family compounds and babysitting grandmas.  I'd love to live in a backyard ADU or MIL apartment and not even bug my kids with daily visits.  Except for babysitting if that was wanted.  I will have the funds to make this happen if it's welcome.

I have never purchased a freestanding SFH so am fine with downsizing.[/quote]

Oh good god no to the family compound where you’ll live in the backyard ADU and be no trouble at all! Are you really going to sit alone in your backyard ADU for every holiday they host with the other in laws, every birthday party, every holiday or event? Nope, you’ll be with them. You will need someone to drive you to medical appointments at some point which is really difficult when you are already juggling work and kid appointments. When you need nursing care and run out of resources, you can’t sell the ADU . I guess your adult kids have to sell the house or daughter or daughter in law gives up her career to wipe you. Yeah, no trouble at all.[/quote]

I will say there is a family near us that went the compound route (both parents and kids have full SFHs with shared backyard) and it seems to have worked well.  There are a number of other siblings that also live within five miles, so everything doesn’t fall into the sibling that lives in the compound.

The parent is now moving into assisted living and selling so they had to put up a fence.[/quote]

Only works if you and most of your siblings live nearby (within 10-15 miles).  Otherwise the burden falls on one sibling and that is challenging[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics