Reply to “My friends warned me not to marry a white woman”

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Reply to "“My friends warned me not to marry a white woman”"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I mean, if you were dating we'd advise you to break up - right?

How is your relationship overall?

Yes, this sounds concerning! Also trollish. [/quote]

Relationship overall has issues. I’ve posted before, often in the ADHD or domestic labor threads. Example, he took the cleaning card but has yet to clean. Doesn’t like having any expectations placed on him. [/quote]

Is there anything but inertia keeping you in this relationship?[/quote]

Main thing is kids. If we didn’t have them, I’d bail. [/quote]

You will not change him. Either go with the flow and then make changes together or divorce. Your kids will benefit from you being home. Just choose a cheaper place to live that you can live on one salary. If he still is a jerk and eventually cheats at least your kids will have more money. If you are smart, you will still get a job later in life. Maybe take some classes to keep current.

If he wanted you to stay home because of religious reasons or because he worked overseas how would you live your life? Maybe just pretend that there is a better reason for you to stay home than him just wanting a stay at home mom. Many make a wonderful like this way. They are fit, they are close to their kids, and have lots of friends. Set aside a set amount of money for the kids each month for their needs and activities. If he wants more money he can earn it.[/quote]

Why should SHE be the one to compromise for the good of the family?

His views are archaic, and he should not be rewarded for misogyny. [/quote]

Because it's not worth living in misery with two people against you and turning your kids against you. Why wasn't this discussed before marriage? She can't have it all anyway. Why not stay home and have it fail monetarily while actually taking care of the kids and building memories and then actually have them be on board with going back to work later?[/quote]

Because she likes to work and why in the WORLD would she give up her means of support when she's married to a guy it sounds like she may be divorcing. I don't think OP is going to be better off if she becomes more dependent on a husband she doesn't seem to like or trust. Also she doesn't want to stay home. [/quote]

Agreed. You stay at work but stop paying for everything as if you stay home and get the cleaning person. Problem solved[/quote]

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