Reply to massive disagreement with husband about handling kids who won't deal with college

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I disagree with the other posters.

Your husband saying HE will write their essays at the deadline is a huge red flag to me. Help them, yes. But write them for the kids? That's awful and teaching the kids horrible life lessons.

I would try to compromise with your husband/the kids and figure out a reasonable schedule. If they want to apply by October 15 and November 1, you need to tell them they need to have a first draft done by X date and they will not get their devices/car privileges until the first draft is done. I would absolutely put my foot down and not let your husband write the essays for them. You can be flexible on not applying early decision, whatever, but allowing a parent to write the essay will lead your kids to think someone will always be there to do their work for them and bail them out.[/quote]

Yeah, there is a compromise here. I would not go punishing them, but help them. It's stressful and avoidance is a way to deal with anxiety. I would absolutely offer to sit down with them and help them navigate Common Ap and I would check over everything. I would start setting small deadlines with them. Have they done the main essay yet? If not, see if the school has a workshop for this. For the smaller essays/paragraphs/extras some schools require set a deadline they write that by Sunday night for the TOP choice school. You and your husband look at it, make suggestions and at least things are moving. [/quote]

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