Reply to How to get through to DH that doing 80% doesn't count?

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Reply to "How to get through to DH that doing 80% doesn't count?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I can be guilty of this.  I do think ADHD is something I struggle with but can mostly manage.  I wish I could say why my brain does it.  It's like.  I know the laundry needs to be switched over but I just end up doing something else and keep saying "I'll do it later".  The difference is that I know it drives DH crazy so I make a real effort to follow through on everything.   I make a lot of lists.  For whatever reason physically crossing things off helps me.   I also make myself stop and say "no, bring the glass to the kitchen when you stand up.   Don't say you'll do it later"[/quote]

Tell me more about the ADHD part. Is this an ADHD thing? Is it procrastination or is it resistance to being told what to do? I'm genuinely curious because DH has ADHD and is medicated for it. [b]It helps him be successful at work but does nothing for him at home.[/b][/quote]

This is how you know it’s not ADHD. Do you really think his medication is formulated to only be effective when he is in the office? [/quote]

6-8 hours after taking it once a day. That’s when it’s effective [/quote]

Then he better either make enough money to outsource his share of household responsibilities or he should look for a less demanding job that doesn't require him to medicate just to do it and then fall apart when he gets home.

The choice to medicate just for work should be a joint decision by the couple and should only be done if that specific job is important enough to justify having one adult in the house who cannot function at home, every single day.

The solution to having this kind of special needs cannot be "well my high functioning mother or wife (or wife I treat like my mother) picks up all the slack at home." What happens if she has a a medical crisis? So he simply cannot take care of the kids or the house while she recovers from surgery? Well then he better have a plan for outsourcing it and be ready to pay.[/quote]

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