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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just send her your menu and ask what you should have on hand for her to eat that she can quickly pull together for herself on the days she won’t eat the stuff you are making. [/quote]

These suggestions are getting ridiculous. This might make sense for a 4 year old following a strict diet for serious health reasons but this is an adult. Capable of ordering food, grocery shopping, planning ahead, or just eating 2 bites of something offered like every other grown adult that doesn’t care for the menu choice.
[/quote]

2 bites.  She’s not eating enough as it is and you want to starve her.  No, be a good host. [/quote]

She's starving herself. Let's assign responsibility accurately here. [/quote]

First. No matter what OP does this visit she’s not going to change her sister nor her parents. So she can choose to make a big deal out of it or just quietly provide the kitchen space or appropriate food options.

Second. Are people who are keto, or carnivore, or vegan, etc. starving themselves? I’m curious if OP’s sister has an actual diagnosed eating disorder or is just - like MANY here - very restricted in order to stay skinny and OP has themselves diagnosed the sister.

Lots of people don’t eat red meat, dairy, bread, etc. and I wouldn’t jump to “eating disorder.” Half the people I know have various restrictions and diets; they’d all have an ED under that logic. [/quote]

To your first statement, the op doesn’t need to change her sister. People are simply saying that she doesn’t have to feed into it nor change herself for her sister. 
You are wrong. [/quote]

She doesn’t HAVE to, no. But it’s just as easy to grill chicken as it is to grill a burger or hot dogs. Keep some eggs annd salad fixings in the fridge and let her sister cook something if she wants. almost like OP is inviting trouble where there is none by being petty. My clue to this was OP saying that it takes “hours” to scrub pans after her sister has used them. I just can’t comprehend how that is the case. [/quote]

[b]It is not just as easy[/b]. OP should not anything to accommodate her apart from a medical issue. [/quote]

OK, so let's really play this out.

Option #1:  OP allows sister to bring her own food and grill some salmon/chicken, maybe cook an egg.  The burden on OP is  two extra pans and an extra dish to clean, assuming sister doesn't do it.  It is also having sister in the kitchen taking up space and being in the way for a bit.

Option #2:  OP draws a line and says she won't prepare any different food and sister isn't allowed to either.  The burden on OP, even if she chooses not to engage, is multiple attempts by parents to change her mind, possibility that some or all do not come, impact on other guests of them not coming, possible altercation during the event when sister attempts to prepare some eggs and OP "enforces the boundary."

Which option is "easier" for OP?[/quote]
There are other options but doesn’t fit your agenda.  OP has to do neither one of those. [/quote]

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