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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just send her your menu and ask what you should have on hand for her to eat that she can quickly pull together for herself on the days she won’t eat the stuff you are making. [/quote]

These suggestions are getting ridiculous. This might make sense for a 4 year old following a strict diet for serious health reasons but this is an adult. Capable of ordering food, grocery shopping, planning ahead, or just eating 2 bites of something offered like every other grown adult that doesn’t care for the menu choice.
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2 bites.  She’s not eating enough as it is and you want to starve her.  No, be a good host. [/quote]

She's starving herself. Let's assign responsibility accurately here. [/quote]

First. No matter what OP does this visit she’s not going to change her sister nor her parents. So she can choose to make a big deal out of it or just quietly provide the kitchen space or appropriate food options.

Second. Are people who are keto, or carnivore, or vegan, etc. starving themselves? I’m curious if OP’s sister has an actual diagnosed eating disorder or is just - like MANY here - very restricted in order to stay skinny and OP has themselves diagnosed the sister.

Lots of people don’t eat red meat, dairy, bread, etc. and I wouldn’t jump to “eating disorder.” Half the people I know have various restrictions and diets; they’d all have an ED under that logic. [/quote]

To your first statement, the op doesn’t need to change her sister. People are simply saying that she doesn’t have to feed into it nor change herself for her sister. 
You are wrong. [/quote]

She doesn’t HAVE to, no. But it’s just as easy to grill chicken as it is to grill a burger or hot dogs. Keep some eggs annd salad fixings in the fridge and let her sister cook something if she wants. almost like OP is inviting trouble where there is none by being petty. My clue to this was OP saying that it takes “hours” to scrub pans after her sister has used them. I just can’t comprehend how that is the case. [/quote]

It is not just as easy. OP should not anything to accommodate her apart from a medical issue. [/quote]

How is it not just as easy to put a piece of chicken breast or salmon (in foil if there’s a concern about fats) on the grill instead of or in addition to hamburgers and hot dogs? In fact, I bet other people would like that as an option too. I don’t have dietary restrictions but would love grilled chicken and salad maybe even over a burger or hot dog.

It is possible to just quietly and nicely do these things - or allow sister the option to do it herself - and not make a big show of it. But, I actually try to enjoy the people and not focus on what is “right” all the time.

I always do “make your own” type meals with a variety of choices people can put together when I host. Taco bar, etc. Then everyone can eat what they want without alienation. [/quote]

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