Reply to If you were from a family with a golden child and scapegoat, how did they turn out as adults?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Meh. We had a golden child and the scapegoat. I think a lot of scapegoats don’t realize that sometimes it really is something they’re doing. My sibling was an incredibly hard child to raise- wild, didn’t follow rules, they slept little, never did chores. It actually made me into the golden child. It was no fun being the golden child. I have a lot of anxiety and never felt like I could let me parents down. I was always performing and had to be perfect. My parents often cried about my sibling and I had to pickup the slack. I didn’t get much attention. Oh and I had to do all their chores which I’m still bitter about.

I wonder sometimes if my sibling had been more easy going if my life would have been easier too. As it stands I’m still picking up their slack- now just with elder care for our parents. [/quote]

This is how my mother justified being the Golden Child. In reality there was little difference between her and my aunt other than the fact my aunt challenged family dysfunction.

Golden child in my family is unemployed, has legal battles of her creating, marriage went up in flames due to her cheating and being emotionally abusive, challenging relationship with her child and friendships fall apart often. I am the scapegoat. My mother seemed to think I was the safe place for her rage and my sister even through adulthood would try to find things to blame me for which was strange since we saw eachother maybe once a year at family functions. When my children were being used as pawns and my husband was noticing they were getting worse, we distanced. Healthy choice for us. Mom continues to enable her GC, but now she has to deal directly with her-no unleashing rage on me.[/quote]

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