Reply to FIL divested assets and now has no way to pay for MIL's nursing home care.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Was there anything in writing about ILs continuing to use the house for living part time or storage?

OP this is so awful and I feel for your MIL. How frightened she must be. I don’t know what you can do right now to help her besides saying to DH and his siblings 
-FIL is an alcoholic and is not capable of managing MILs care
-It is scary that he is denying you access to records and providers
-I hope that you approach him together and tell FIL to name one of you as POA, and tell him you will go to court if he says no

[b]It sounds like everyone has danced to FIL’s fiddle for a long time, and no one wants to stand up to him. [/b]It’s impossible for the rest of the family to make any decisions or figure anything out because FIL denies the information. Unless one of the children can take over I feel that MIL will be trapped under his “care.””

I’m also worried for BIL and his wife in the original house.  If FIL tries to bring her there without adequate care, but could put them in a dicey position.  Perhaps needs to be reported to adult social services.

Wow, so sorry OP

[/quote]

The bolded so, so, so much. The adult children afraid to confront their alcoholic father. I think I'd tell my husband that you object to helping with MIL's bills unless and until FIL talks to an elder care law attorney and your husband is allowed to be present for that conversation. I have a feeling the financial situation might be much worse than you all think - i.e. - mountains of debt.[/quote]

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