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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Men vary as caregivers. Most are innatentive, incompetent, not paying close enough attention, flouting the rules, etc. they do the bare minimum. They don't have patience. They yell  they don't care about routine, baths, and illnesses like pink eye or rash. Yet during divorce they don't want to pay child support and sthink without their wife around they'll manage fine with 50/50. What a crappy situation for the kids and the poor mothers having to worry [/quote]A newly divorced dad at our elementary school sent his 6 yo to school in tights and a t shirt, with no pants or skirt.  You could see her underwear.  They had to send her to the office to get something from lost and found.  Apparently he didn't know the difference between tights and leggings.  :roll: [/quote]

I can believe it! While my ex and I have a good co-parenting relationship, he remains a ding dong. I'm the one who gets the emails about dress code violations when he puts our child in non uniform items to go to the school they've been going to for three years. And I have to remind him about things like brushing their hair. It could be worse, but it is a difference.[/quote]

If those are your worst complaints it sounds like he’s doing a good job.  [/quote]

They aren't my worst complaints...but in general he does ok. I do remind about things like brushing hair and giving allergy meds. Even when you have 50/50 time, you're still their mother/father 100% of the time![/quote]

You sound incredibly petty.  [/quote]

I’m a DP but you, PP, sound like you don’t know much about raising school-age children.

Kid comes to school without uniform and gets violations because their dad can’t dress them? Has a “discipline problem” at school. Depending on the discipline structure at school that means various consequences like missing pizza parties or other privileges. You really think a kid whose parents are splitting needs a harder life?

Kid comes to school without allergy medicine and either spends the day miserable or the nurse calls a parent (probably not dad) to disrupt their day and bring the meds. You think that’s better for learning?

Kid shows up without even brushed hair? Best case the other kids are awful to her— and again you feel like that’s something a kid with divorced parents needs?— worst case the teachers are all gossiping about how X Family is neglectful.

They’ve studied this pretty rigorously that well groomed children get more attention in school. Your kid doesn’t even have their hair brushed? As an elementary school teacher said to me once— teachers don’t think it’s their job to care more than the parents. [/quote]

Really, if those are the worst offenses, it's ok.  No one is early as perfect as you.  Pizza parties are not important.  Leave extra clothing at school.  And, medicine.  Leave a brush and ask the teacher to help.  Or meet them before school and do it.[/quote]

Tell a seven year old whose dad couldn’t be bothered to get them in the right uniform, who is the only kid excluded from the party, that it’s not important. I’m sure they’ll agree that it’s insignificant.

Medicine as someone else already posted is often designed to be given not at school.

“A brush and ask the teacher to help” is a really neat way to show disrespect for your kids teacher— they should be your kids nursemaid so the child’s parent doesn’t have to remember little things like grooming. School will hate you.

And you’d actually know all those things if you were a decent parent to a school age kid and so, I’m sorry for your kids or sorry for your wife.[/quote]

Then make a bag per night the kid is there with everything they need to make it easy.  That’s what I do when mine travel without me.  Lots of options. [/quote]

No, I'm not making a 'bag' per night. My dc lives with their mother AND their father. They have the things they need at both homes because they live there. The parent they are with needs to make sure they are dressed appropriately, groomed and dispense meds. I'm not expecting an elem. age kid to dispense their own medications-but you know that, and just want to argue your incorrect point.[/quote]

Then why are you posting here?   Makes zero sense.  [/quote]
It's a thread about 50/50 . I'm not surprised it makes zero sense to you.[/quote]

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