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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My super strict Korean immigrant parents did not allow me to wear makeup, date, hang out with friends. They didn't believe in having girls play sports. They were extremely worried about us picking up "low class" behaviors. They also expected us to look after them financially when they retired despite their physical abuse when we acted or spoke in a disrespectful way. (I was objectively a good kid; never got into trouble, earned straight A's, and ended up at an Ivy.)
Unfortunately, this backfired. I had no relationship with my sexist father once I graduated from college; and to be brutally honest, I was relieved when he died.
My cousins who grew up similarly also have estranged relationships with their parents. [/quote]
This is sad, but I hear ya.

- child of Korean immigrant parents

My parents didn't want me to talking to a boy. If one called on the phone, I got the 3rd degree.  Even when I had moved out at 23 (they didn't want me to but I couldn't stand living at home anymore), they didn't like that I had a male friend over watching a movie. Literally nothing else happened. Then they expected me to get married at 26.  How they expected me to meet boys and get to know them when they didn't want me interacting with them, I don't know.

They eventually gave up trying to control me and was just happy I finally got married, to a non Asian, at the ripe old age of 33.  I think they were desperate by then to see me married, so as long as the man was decent and hardworking, that was good enough. LOL.   20 years later, they think he's the best thing since sliced bread.. actually in their words.."he must be a wonderful man to tolerate you".  Nice, eh?[/quote]

PP who is married to a Korean man for 20 years.  You made me laugh out loud.  I wasn't trusted by my mother in law at first, she had been trying for years to set up her son with a nice Korean girl from church.  He had nothing against church going Korean girls, he just didn't fall in love with any of them.  But by the time we got married, I could do no wrong in her eyes; it was quite comical.  After I had my first child, she actually said to me, I'm so glad you aren't Korean because I don't have to pretend I don't like you in front of my friends.  I knew that mil/dil relationships were stereotypically fraught, but I hadn't realized she was struggling with leaving it behind.[/quote]

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