Reply to Broke due to child support and alimony

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Move to a different country and give up your citizenship.  Send checks only to coveje kids.

US divorce courts are GROSSLY unfair to men.  Period.

The faster you get out the better. Singapore speaks English everywhere.  You are literally a modern day slave who'll keep laying alimony for for.  It's slavery. [/quote]

The data on courts being unfair to men would disagree with your assertion. In general, men tend to come out of divorces okay financially, but it often tips women and children into poverty. [/quote]

Oh please, women get 'tipped into poverty' because they don't want to work or don't get jobs.

Why shouldn't it be a man's job to support an ex with alimony payments for virtually infinity to make sure she has a comfy lifestyle?  There are no guarantees in life, lol. Should I get compensated from my brokerage account bank if I lose money on the stock market after making a bad stock pick too?

Sh!t, if a court forced me into barely liveable wages because they wanted me to pay insane amounts of child support and alimony per month I'd get the hell outta Dodge and move abroad. No way would I be shackled for years living a miserable life because my ex thinks she deserves thousands per month in alimony.  It is just legalized slavery and/or indentured service. [/quote]

So you would leave your children behind and move abroad to escape supporting them?  
Or you would move your children to Singapore with you?

If you were to stay here, what is it that you want?  You want to take the kids away from their mother and have full custody so that you don’t have to pay child support?  Or you would want your kids to live in poverty half of the time or most of the time in order to pay less child support?

What is it that you want to spend your money on that’s more important than your kids?  
 [/quote]

I have no problems giving child support payments.  What I have a problem with is alimony and the expectation that I should be financially supporting an ex-spouses lifestyle. The entire concept is asinine.  The ex spouse can get a job if they need money.  It's not my responsibility to make sure my ex has a certain lifestyle threshold.

If I ever got saddled with years or permanent alimony you can sure as hell bet I'd give up my citizenship and move abroad.  I wouldn't even care if I had to work as a bus boy in a restaurant abroad....as long as I'm giving an ex spouse $0 it'd be worth it.  They can hire expensive lawyers to pick over the carcass of any social security entitlements for all I care.

I'd let the kids decide where they'd want to live - the US or Singapore.  NBD.  I'd make it well aware to them that Singapore has far better healthcare, better education, no guns, and basically no crime. Plus amazing food scenes.  I could easily sell them on moving there. [/quote]

So, you would be okay with paying for childcare, but not with food or clothes or utilities for your children?  Would you pay your ex-spouse for half the PTO they would need to take for sick kids, snow days, etc?  Or just paying them something for doing all of the childcare?

And how would you take care of children working as a bus boy in Singapore?  Doesn’t that sound harder than giving your ex-spouse $500/month in alimony or whatever.

[/quote]

So the person I know that this happened to: her kids lifestyle changed drastically. She did go back to work making about 60k - the dad made a lot of money and once he left the country, he would just decide if and how much he’d send. I lost touch with her because she could no longer afford the activities our kids did together. She found cheaper alternatives. Her kids, particularly the older, was very talented, but that kid quit making progress once dad quit paying and could no longer afford good coaching. The kids attitudes and personalities also changed. Maybe they ended up fine but I’m certain they didn’t go as far as they could have if dad hadn’t up and left. IMO kids benefit from both parents whether they live together or not and he abandoned his responsibility to these kids. The mom would have been working regardless of the child support and alimony, and she was a selfless mom that put everything she had into her kids. [/quote]

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