Reply to I hate “guy trips”

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think a lot of you guys are missing that he’s also getting behind at work from these trips. My husband works a ton and works most weekends. Even 4 days visiting family he has to work or he’s stressed out and annoying for a week or more after. If he was gone drinking for 4 days and came back complaining about all the work he was behind on I would find that very annoying. I 100 percent believe that he’s unhelpful and difficult to be around for quite a few days after.

I think he’s entitled to see his friends but he’s not entitled to minimize how it affects you. I don’t have concrete suggestions about what to do (although I personally would just rather have my house in a hotel for an extra day rather than listening to any complaining - I actually encourage my husband to do similar things when he’s traveling for work) but I understand, OP. I feel these situations really emphasize to me how tightly stretched we are all the time and I wish my husband would agree and be open to making changes. But when you handle all the fall out (which I would rather do than make my kids handle it because when my husband is stressed he yells more than I’m ok with) and they refuse to change it’s very hard. [/quote]

OP - I feel heard and seen with this post.  This is exactly the problem with my DH.  He too works 60-80 hours a week, including the weekends. When he takes time away its always a HUGE problem.  He took a few calls while we was gone on his trip but obviously did not work his normal hours while gone. [/quote]

Do you have a job, OP? Or are you just a homemaker/kept woman? If the latter, you don't get to have this attitude. He works hard to provide for you and the children and deserves to blow off some steam. [/quote]

OP - as I have said in a previous post I work full time.  My job provides our families health insurance and a healthy pension.  I make less than DH but my income is a big contribution to our family. [/quote]

I'm sorry, but if you're working 40 hours a week, it is a HUGE difference to work 60-80 as you said your husband works. That's how you make the big money that, I'm sure, you enjoy the benefits of. So of course you're the default parent. Why is he even supposed to wake up with you and make sure the kids get breakfast, etc.? So your family gets health insurance and a "healthy pension" with your job, but I would strongly suspect that you have a very nice quality of life supported by his very long hours at the office.

Having said that, a week of fallout is too much. He needs to suck up the hangover for a day and then act like nothing is the matter. His need to catch up on work though isn't really something you can hold against him because the only way to prevent that is to never take time away.

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