Reply to 13 year old dd and CPS

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "13 year old dd and CPS"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. First off CPA has not come yet. Has been 3-4 days. Lawyers I talk to say different things: it may take them up to a month to come, talk to them or don't say anything... and that they will make my life miserable etc etc. I get that no lawyer is going to dissuade me from hiring them so will make it sound worse. This incident (as well as the comments I read here) has given me a moment to reflect on my own parenting style and hope to not be so reactive moving forth. I am much to blame for what happened and she is the way she is in part because of her parents (other dd is super chill so I do think personality is also a factor) Ex will not let me see my dd and I'm afraid he is building a case against me or something because he had dd take photos, recorded conversations w me, and turns out, he knew perfectly well when he sent dd to talk to therapist to talk about what happened knowing the therapist is a mandatory reporter. He has a lawyer helping him. Not sure what he's trying to do, maybe challenge custody so he can get out of paying child support? Who knows. He is probably giddy now. I need to find a way to be able to talk to dd and not sure where/how since ex won't let me see her. I regret what happend and hope this one off lapse in judgement on my part will not ruin my relationship w dd. I take full ownership for smacking her. Have not been able to sleep or eat wracked with guilt and worry.[/quote]

OP, Im sorry you lost your temper and used poor reactive judgment in the heat of the moment.
And I’m sorry that your teen is a bit out of control as well.
Ex isn’t helping in this nightmare, but I suggest you just give up fighting and agree to time apart IF that is what DD says she wants. 
Apologize for the slap (because that was your part in the wrong). Take ownership that you responded poorly and impulsively. This was not the high road.
Then tell her your parameters (no phone at your home for two weeks—or whatever the original punishment was that resulted in her retaliating by hiding your phone—starting whenever she decides to resume visits). This is your non-negotiable and has nothing to do with the escalated events that followed.
If she doesn’t comply, then cede your time to dad and he can single parent for a while.
Remain calm and loving, but stand firm that you can’t allow her to behave the way she has been behaving with no consequences because that isn’t good for her.
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics