Reply to Why do SILs hate the women their brothers marry?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it is just[b] classic bully-the-outsider-with-relational-aggression stuff[/b]. I've experienced this with my SILs for sure, but experienced it with the women lawyers in my office when I first began practicing too. Very similar stuff. I don't think it is about the brother or anything. [/quote]

It might also have to do with the brother, if the sisters are accustomed to bossing the brother around (ie: toxic roles in the family). [/quote]

Also, some people do not communicate well - their having an opinion is seen as "complaining", so they are taught to stuff everything inside, like a 1940's conservative housewife. Then, when a new person comes along, they tend to judge (often harshly), because that kind of talk is seen as acceptable in the family. MIL and FIL were terrible communicators, and did not like each other very much, and that obviously adversely affected the DH and his siblings. When you grow up in a family that does not communicate well, if at all, of course most of the family members will be very angry in life. [/quote]

Which circles back to an eternal maxim easily applied to bad SIL situations, "It's not about you." It's about them and their insecurities/jealousies/whatever.[/quote]

Agree.  Their brother could have married anyone, and the SIL may have had different issues with them, but they would have issues with them regardless. Some SILs are immature and broken. Heck, I've hear petulant MILs declare "I just don't like her" about the DIL - and the DIL literally did nothing at all to the MIL - the MIL is just a miserable witch.

Ce la vie. [/quote]

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