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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP didn't ask for permission to invite her father.or approval.  It's perfectly fine to invite ones parent and current partner for a holiday.

She title her thread mom is upset.

Op, it's ok to let your mom be upset.

She's an adult.  She will get over it.  Cut the apron strings already [/quote]

OP also didn't plan to invite her dad. He said he would be there for Thanksgiving. That obliged her to invite him to dinner. It's the height of rudeness. Some of you apparently were raised in barns. The right thing to do is tell dad sorry you have plans but can see you at another time. It's not ok to just let mom be upset about your dick moves. What's wrong with you?[/quote]

OP wasn't obliged to do anything.  She didn't complain about her father.  She complained about her mom's emotional blackmail.  Learn to read. The worst thing to do in response to emotional blackmail is to give in to it.   Her mom doesn't get Thanksgiving priority because she is willing to use blackmail.  She can stay home.[/quote]

That's what Mom is now planning to do. OP is now rethinking the horrible idea to let her dad crash the already planned party. [/quote]

That's fine.  Mom can stay home and sulk.  And should.  OP can entertain her dad and his gf on Thanksgiving.  If the mom changes her mind fine, if not thats fine too.  The mom has zero priority over the dad, they are both equal.

Of course OP is concerned about continued emotional blackmail but she can tell her mom to stop and if her mom doesn't stop she can fo no contact until her mom acts reasonably.

Nothing the op posted shows any reason to other the father and exclude him from Thanksgiving.

If the mom wants to exclude herself that's up to her.[/quote]

I know you're probably trolling but nothing in the OP indicated emotional blackmail. The mom set her very reasonable boundary: if her ex-H (and his wife!) are invited, she's not coming. The mom had plans first. She obviously wouldn't have invited ex-H to her home where Thanksgiving was originally planned and it was then moved to OP's house at OP's request. It wasn't right for OP to let her dad invite himself, knowing that her mom would not have anticipated spending a holiday with him. But I think OP will correct this by inviting dad on another day.[/quote]

Dad has just as much right to spend Thanksgiving with OP as Mom.  Mom is just a jealous old witch.  She wants OP to feel guilty and feel sorry for her.

Do not cave in to your mom's blackmail op.[/quote]

Yes dad has every right to make Thanksgiving plans with his daughter but he didn't. He just figured he'd maybe roll in to say hi when he was in town. Apparently meeting his grandchild didn't warrant a visit home so he'll take a chance he can swing by while he's in town for some other reason (probably to do with his wife). Hopefully, dad will be better about making Christmas plans with his daughter. [/quote]

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