Reply to Wanting to divorce a “recovered” spouse

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[quote=Anonymous]I feel similarly (NP.)  In my case, though, DH has realized he is autistic.  That provided some relief initially but I am still mad at myself for not knowing earlier (which is an impossible thing) because we didn't know as much about autism back then.

So many of the outbursts and fights we have are related to autism and while I still find the disrespect unacceptable, my criticism of it and pushback provokes shame in him but also defensiveness so we never get anywhere because I'm "too critical."  If I had known that 2-3 years in, he'd drop his mask I would have not entered into this.  20+ years and kids later, here we are and leaving is complicated.

I have always felt I should push back (verbally counter every condescending, critical comment) as a model for my kids in not accepting poor treatment but it seems to only make things worse.

For me, the love is gone (except the kind of love one has for relatives.)  It's sad and I also feel bad for him because I think he did the best he could with the tools he had, not knowing most of his life that he had these challenges.  [/quote]

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