Reply to DD unintentionally gave 1st grandchild same first name as DH’s AP

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Reply to "DD unintentionally gave 1st grandchild same first name as DH’s AP"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I feel like this is fake someone trying to make a point that affairs have long term impact.

And on the small chance it's not fake get over it. You took your flea bag husband back you can get over a name. Get on Google and find 100 other associations for the name of you must.

Don't bring your drama to your daughter.  I'd never forgive my mom if she started crap about not liking a name or negative associations etc

You chose to lie about the affair to stay married well you can keep on keeping it to you and DH.[/quote]

NP not OP, but this thread has had quite a few of these nastily worded "get over it" posts. OP comes here being vulnerable and gets a few kind but frank responses, then gets these petty, mean-spirited replies. This site gets uglier by the day lately. Whether one thinks OP should tell DD all, or say nothing, there is no reason-- except several PPs' needs to feel superior by crapping on OP -- for these posts with a crazy mean tone. Just say you think telling DD is a bad idea, without your weird need to insult OP, who already has enough to deal with. Her choice to take back her DH isn't the issue here, either, and you have zero knowledge of why she is doing that.

[/quote]

I mean, her last line (“all of the joy of being a grandmother is now gone” I’m paraphrasing) is eye opening and not in a good way. Posting here is a good way to get a pulse check and people are looking out for DD who has done nothing wrong beyond excitedly tell her mother she’s settled on a name, and does not deserve to have this dumped on her while pregnant. [/quote]

It's not a "pulse check" to insult OP personally and insult her choice re: her husband. It's digging in and relishing blaming her personally.

Yes, she engaged in hyperbole with the "all the joy is gone" comment. But I'm wagering those who are opining with such personal vitriol are people who have not themselves ever had to live day in and day out with the fresh pain of learning about a spouse's affair. PPS here couldn't just shrug off the obvious hyperbole and just tell her that she would be making a mistake to turn the baby's name into an issue with DD; they had to get personal about OP as an indivdual. That's what sticks in my craw and what makes this thread and this site more toxic, when it wasn't, not long ago. Few want to answer questions with compassion; it's more fun here to see how you can slam OPs -- in many threads, not just this one -- while padding your slams with "Oh, we're just being frank for your own good! It's just a pulse check!" [/quote]

Guys the term is “sense check.”  If you are checking for a pulse, someone is potentially dead.[/quote]

It's a business term. No one here is practicing medicine as it relates to the topic so you don't need to be pedantic.[/quote]

+1. Also don’t refer to a group as “guys”, it’s 2023. [/quote]

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