Reply to I think my marriage may be over

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Reply to "I think my marriage may be over"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A divorce would be terrible for your daughter.  [/quote]

OP does not mention any concerns about that, but, you are correct, PP. She seems to feel like she is starring in a remake of "How Stella Got Her Groove Back" or something. Therapy seems to be making OP more self focused and externalizing of her issues.

OP, you have a lot of family baggage and ARE your mother, whether you realize it or not, now. If you don't want to be, change yourself. That is the only person we have control over, after all. Give your husband the love and marriage you feel YOU deserve and see how things go from there. Love is a verb and an action. Do it for him and do it for your daughter, who is in the shoes you say harmed you. Funny how we repeat those patterns. Since your therapist has not helped you notice that, maybe a change is in order there too?

Maybe more focus on how your actions do or may impact others and less time feeling hard done by? What is that Buddhist saying, "Wherever you go, there you are?" Walking out is not the fix, it is inside you. Love the family you have. Your foot out the door routine is impacting your kid, too. If you want her to be able to connect with people and have stable relationships, YOU have to model that for her. Figure out why you are working against what you claim to want. [/quote]

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