Reply to So here we are, as expected

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[quote=Anonymous]If your sister was already providing total care, then your parents’ situation was working for them. A fall/broken hip could have occurred in a nursing home/assisted living, too. They had a pretty good run, and now they’ll be forced to make some big decisions, with the help of the hospital social worker or case manager. Perhaps it IS true that your sister’s caregiving enabled her to live in your parents’ home for free but again, she was providing a good deal of care, which would’ve been extremely costly to your parents. I don’t think your derision toward her is warranted.

That being said - you are 100% entitled to set your own boundaries and make a decision about the support you can or cannot provide, in terms of hands-on caregiving or financial help; there is no need to feel guilty about it, even if your family’s choices elicit those feelings. If your dad spends weeks/months in rehab and your sister decides to care for him in their home afterward, that’s her choice; it does NOT mean you need to participate beyond whatever you decide is reasonable (i.e.  paying for a supplementary aide, managing finances from a distance, problem-solving solutions, absolutely nothing, etc.).

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