Reply to husband as "junior partner" in childrearing

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Listen. One parent reads books and learns about how to grow while raising kids.

One parent doesn’t read a word.

Not that reading books makes you good. Lots of people don’t read, but you talk to them, and they have a solid philosophy, or took related college classes, or had a preschool teaching experience, etc etc etc. It’s the effort.

The person who doesn’t learn is the junior partner. And they can’t say crap to the senior partner unless they jump in and work at it.[/quote]

This. It's not about reading books, it's just about putting in the effort and actually focusing on parenting as a valuable undertaking.

Someone upthread talked about how if you value something, you'll invest time and energy in it. I think about the effort some men I know put into buying a road bike, a car, following bands, traveling, etc. They do research. They spend time online investigating what experts say, weighing options. They try out different things and see what they like and what they don't. They can talk for hours on these subjects and it's clear they are passionate and invested.

I have met a couple men who are like this about parenting. Seriously, like two. But that is the kind of energy a lot of women put into parenting. Not controlling or obsessive, but just like "this really matters to me, I want to do it right." That might mean reading parenting books and trying out some of the techniques, or it could just mean putting in the hours with their kids to learn what works and what doesn't, or just to be present for their kids because they really value the role of parent.[/quote]

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