Reply to Friend group is blowing up due to rift between teen girls

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[quote=Anonymous]Here’s the deal, if you want to continue to have this longtime circle, you have to coach DD. 
If you all are going to stay close, the kids need to treat each other like cousins. If the friend asked to tag along - 1 time - on something, DD should’ve said yes. (If you guys are close family friends.) DD doesn’t have to sit with her at lunch every day or invite her to every sleepover or be BFFs, but yes, if you are family friends & she asks to tag along, you say yes like a nice cousin.
If that is not the case, you are not close family friends, then yes, you don’t have to get involved. Just don’t be surprised if the mother then wants to distance from you. It’s kind of a package deal at this point, you & DD can decide how much you want to invest in these relationships. But I dont think you can be very close friends without teaching your kids that we teach our close family friends/cousins with some extra generosity/kindness that you might not give some random kid.
And I say this as a parent of both o e on the “cool” kid side & the other side. If you are going to keep these relationships, this is how you need to talk to your DD. And with the other mom, you can tell her you are sorry & have talked to your DD (there probably won’t be any more requests so you dont have to worry - but if the girl asks if she can tag along one day, tell DD to be kind & let her once, to help her out).[/quote]

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