Reply to Working Parents Who Aren’t Tired — Tell us your schedule or secret sauce

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Our kids are in the same school and we trade walking duties with other families on our street - it makes no sense for 10+ adults walking every morning so we assemble at a corner and a few adults walk a gaggle of kids the last 1/4 mile.

Rec sports, but we car pool and don’t go to every single practice.

We don’t go to the gym. We workout with a Lululemon Mirror and run or bike outside from home.

We also both go to the office on Wednesday, so that is our takeout night. We usually batch cook on the weekend which gets us through Tuesday.

We almost never “run errands”. I use curbside pick up for groceries at Harris Teeter ($100/year) and BJs (free). We also use curbside at Target, Whole Foods, Michael’s, and Home Depot for anything that Amazon doesn’t have. My kids order their clothes from websites - neither has ever been in a shopping mall / department store. We have a pharmacy a block from home on the way to/from school.

Our house is not a mess because our kids unpack bags when they come in the door and they each have one cubby for their backpack/coat/shoes and one basket for papers they bring home. We have an “inbox” for things we need to review and sign. We all pick up for 5 min after dinner so that the clutter can’t accumulate. [/quote]

Let me summarize some actionable changes:

1. Don’t run errands, curbside everything you can at stores that align with your commute or school location. 
2. Don’t do laundry only on Saturday. At least 1 load should be done most days. Older kids can handle this.
3. Don’t make 3 meals. Make 1 meal that works for everyone. This most means “build your own” like burritos, Mediterranean bowls, ramen with toppings.
4. Don’t do all the work once kids are asleep. Kids should all chip in for 15-20 min after dinner. 
5. Set strict expectations about clutter and set a good example. Teach everyone in your house “don’t put it down, put it away”. 
6. Take time away alone for your hobbies and friends. Your children are old enough that each adult should have one “free night” per week where they can work as late as they want, go to a class, meet a friend for drinks, etc. That’s how you have hobbies. 
7. Talk on Sunday at dinner about “how we win the week”. Have adults put reminders and calendar events in their phones in real time, maybe the oldest as well if needed. Write on a white board if needed. We lay out the whole week - who is packing or buying lunch each day, who is driving which kids, what we are eating and if it’s before or after sports, what we are getting for takeou t Wednesday including the kids’ orders, any adult commitments when they won’t be around, any thing we need to do that week - like pick out a birthday present, make an appointment or reservation, etc.

Make a plan and stick to it. Expect more from your kids, they are old enough to contribute to the household without being nagged. [/quote]

I like these they are great. Unfortunately there is zero retail along our work and school commutes nor near our work, as hard as that may be to fathom. I’ll just countdown the days till the oldest can go shopping for us…

I love the burrito and ramen with “meat” toppings, I’ll definitely try that. We makes a lot of salads so adding grilled chicken offers some alignment.

Oldest does own laundry entirely; younger two help but middle has ADHD and messiness is a CONSTANT battle. Youngest is actually helpful with laundry but has limitations to reaching dryer etc.[b] we just end up with sheets and towels on weekends which is a lot. [/b]

All help cleanup, but clutter is likely an issue — we have a 1900 sq ft 40s home, so not much storage, no garage, so kinda of on top of each other for family of 5. I think that adds to our tiredness, the endless game of “stuff” Tetris to put things away. [/quote] Everyone should be reusing towels.   At least three uses before wash.  One towel for a bath, not several.  Sheets changing once a week is fine, but you can get away with every other week.  [/quote]

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