Reply to "Girl things" for boys - nail polish on a toddler boy

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Reply to ""Girl things" for boys - nail polish on a toddler boy"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to ask yourself why you really want to have your toddler boy show off painted nails outside the home. Signaling that you are progressive is not a good reason.

You should of course tell the child care provider that she is out of place for wiping the polish off and telling him it's only for girls. That's not her place at all, I agree. That's your place. You should cut back on this activity until he is old enough to choose for himself whether he wants to challenge social norms and be an accessory to your need to signal. [/quote]

There are some good points here, although the tone is a bit accusatory. But it's true that the child has every right to care about his appearance and reputation, and to try to encourage him to defy social norms (even if those norms are silly) regarding nail polish outside the home when he is clearly uncomfortable with how people react to it (including other children, I'd guess -- if they haven't said anything yet, they eventually will) will come across to many like it's more about how important non-conformity is to you than about the child's interests. When he is older and better understands the norms that exist he can draw his own conclusions about whether he thinks the norms matter and are worth following, and you can help him with conversations sharing your views on the topic but also let him know other people have different views. He is only 3 right now so it's not worth him suffering over what is to you a matter of principle, but you can help him to think through his own views and values regarding this when his brain is more developed.[/quote]

This.[/quote]

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