Reply to For those of you who don't have family help...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Omg, OP. Don’t listen to any of these people. They don’t have a life you want. They don’t have a marriage you want. And they certainly are not the sort of parent you probably want to be. Congratulations on being married to someone you want to spend time with. Congratulations on seeing through the crazy reality of parenting, which prevents you from actually getting great time with the person you picked to spend your life with!

We also had no help (and to be honest, we wouldn’t have accepted it anyway, for a variety of reasons). We also starting taking staycations (usually one night in a local hotel) when our kids were around 1 (I think we first left our youngest when she was 3 months old - newsflash, babies are easy, although pumping in a hotel room is not my favorite). Find a great nanny, cultivate babysitters and incorporate them into your lives like family.  Use them repeatedly - we have two standing “late nights” (9pm like the wild party animals we are) per week. We take one week long trip a year without our kids. We generally each take one friends trip a year without our spouse. Lean into the advantage of having kids later, which is generally that you have a lot more money. Kids are wonderful. Kids are hard. Make your own breaks. Have fun. And don’t let any of these crazy puritans try to tell you that it’s not okay to want to spend time with your spouse :)[/quote]

I’m sorry, but what on earth are you talking about? There’s not a single post on this entire thread where anyone says that you it’s not ok for OP to want to spend time alone with her husband. [/quote]

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