Reply to s/o - Do you lose respect for someone if you've found out he or she has had an affair?

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[quote=Anonymous]Actually, some things are black and white and an affair is one of them IMO. I don't really care about the morals, because people do immoral things all the time and I believe they can learn from them and grow. But thinking that an affair is a route to happiness is delusional. Short term happiness okay, but it really wrecks most people's chances for any kind of fulfillment.

I know that people will come on and say they don't care about long term fulfillment but I don't believe that's true. I think most people want to feel good - not short term good, but good about the kind of person they are, patient, kind, the kind of person who doesn't get bogged down by little things, the kind of person that has an ease about them. Who is happy and fulfilled from within and not from circumstances and people which are shifting and changing and can't be counted on.

An affair is mainly about instant gratification and validation and it screws with your chances of that, it at least delays it. Most people if you are not a sociopath will feel badly at some point when the affair ends, and most affairs do end.[/quote]

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