Reply to “Your baby isn’t invited.”

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Reply to "“Your baby isn’t invited.”"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For many of us no kids means we can’t come. Yes, I use sitters when I can but sometimes that’s not possible. My partner is out of the country a good chunk of the year and parents aren’t near. I have a huge rotation of sitters and sometimes it all fails to line up. I appreciate the preference but it is also limiting. [/quote]

I think the people who are adamantly “no kids” are people who are (1) young, and don’t know a lot of people with kids, (2) reasonably well off, such that sitters for a few hours on a Saturday don’t feel onerous, and (3) have friend groups that are fairly homogenous and everyone else is fairly young and well off too. So it seems obvious to them that a shower is adults only because they just don’t know people for whom it’s an issue.

It’s like how some people think a destination bachelorette party to Vegas or Miami or New Orleans is a given, and that all their friends will want to go and have the money to spend on it, no problem. They think “this is just what you do” and it doesn’t always occur to them that this is just what a fairly small and privileged minority of people do. It seems like “everyone” does it because everyone they follow on Instagram does it.

Often these folks don’t realize that events like this sometimes pose a hardship even for their friends, who they assume are all in the same financial/life situation, and the might not realize that a sitter for the afternoon can easily cost $100+ and that might feel like a lot for someone already paying for full time daycare who isn’t super high income. Or that dropping 2k on a trip to Vegas for a bachelorette is a huge (maybe impossible) burden for some folks.

And then the sad thing is when someone bows out of an event like this for financial reasons, and people think “we’ll she’s not supporting me in this special moment” which I’ve also seen happen.

It’s myopic. People need to think.[/quote]

Thank you. 💗

I was expecting sh¡tp*st responses. This was kind. [/quote]

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