Reply to Why don’t more parents understand that adult kids have leverage nowadays to cut off contact, and

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree. I wish I had cut my parents off after HS, or even college but I didn't have the guts. I was afraid to be financially independent. I regret that. I think it would have been tough, but I would have made it. I also desperately wanted our family to "work" and kept coming back trying to make it work.

My sibling left the state after HS and never came back, not even for our parents' funerals.

This generation is much more empowered.

I am close with my teens and I am not worried. I treat my teens like adults in the making giving them more and more responsibility and freedom each year. I am looking forward to seeing the adults they become. [b]I respect them for the individuals they are. My parents never allowed me to have a different opinion, taste in music, movies, books, clothes, food etc. They would become very angry if I didn't conform to them 100%.[/b]

My own parents called me a disappointment, mediocre, hit me, belittled me, told me I would never succeed in my dream job (I am, BTW), told me they loved me b/c I was their kid but didn't like me, emotionally manipulated me into doing things I didn't want to do by weeping,  acting depressed/suicidal. The list goes on.

As they say, the bar was so low it was painted on the floor.[/quote]

I experienced the same and find it so strange especially now that I have kids.  I don’t see why having a different opinion or taste threatened my parents so much!  [/quote]

Thank you for saying that. It took me a long time to realize why I was so insecure in my judgment about things, and also why I was so afraid of being judged or people disagreeing with me.

I always told my kids growing up that it was totally fine and good to have a different opinion from me or anyone else in the family. I love ketchup on my scrambled eggs but if you think that's gross it's finer nd vice versa. We are all individuals. I was made to feel stupid and tacky and clueless for my taste when I was younger. Honestly I still struggle with making decisions now.

Sorry, if that was OT! [/quote]

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