Reply to How much of your daily life revolves around your kids?

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "How much of your daily life revolves around your kids?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you have a full, enriching life outside of your kids, you are either a negligent parent or a rich one (or both). [/quote]

[b]I think some of this is semantics, though. When I read "full, enriching life outside of kids,"[/b] what that means to me is that you have other things in your life that are as rewarding and time consuming as parenting. That seems impossible, since parenting is both unbelievably time consuming (even with one kid, even with help, even with money) and I have found there are very few things in life as gratifying and rewarding on a profound level. Like yeah, I read books and have friends and have a couple hobbies, but do these things provide me with a deep sense of meaning and purpose the way parenting does? No.

So yes, I'm on board with parents having an identity outside of their kids. For themselves and for their kids, actually -- I think it's good for kids to see their parents living rich lives and taking care of themselves and also to not always be the center of their parents' attention at all times. But the idea of a "full" life outside your kids, assuming your kids are under age 15 or so, seems like an extremely high bar that would necessarily mean neglecting parenting to some degree.

I have a very good life and I think balanced life, but if my kid was suddenly missing from it, the sense of loss would be complete. Nothing I do matters as much to me. I know one day I will need to fill my life in a different way and I want to remember that, but for this season of life, my kid sits squarely on the front burner and that's where my focus is.[/quote]

"Full, enriching life" PP here -- yes, I think my phrasing has been misunderstood a bit. I, too, would be devastated if I didn't have my DC. I mostly meant "identity outside of kids", though perhaps I place relatively more weight on things like hobbies and free time and romantic time than others in this thread have described.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics