Reply to If you know you’ll be inheriting a significant amount

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If your parents really had all that much, they would have taken advantage of this era of trumps estate tax exemption to gift to you. Since they havent, to me that means they have something in the five to ten million range. Hate to break it to you, but they could go through most or all of that. My parents' elder care costs 300k per year. Your parents could live another ten to twnety years.

Dont count on it until it is in your bank account.[/quote]

How can one possibly spend $300K per year on eldercare? And even if it somehow were possible, it would likely entail a level of luxury and self-indulgence that most parents would not engage in in lieu of giving money to their kids and grandkids.[/quote]

You don’t know what you’re talking about. Do the damn math. I could show you receipts from the elder care company. [/quote]

Most people don’t have the money to spend $300k per year on elder care.  You may as well go around saying elder care is a mandatory 5 million a year.  The average person come up with other solutions.  It’s why so much of what you expect to inherit depends on spending levels.  Are your parents the type who spend $300k a year on something?  Did they send kids to private schools, drive luxury cars, expensive travel etc?  If so, expect nothing.  Are your parents the type who save, save save and refuse to spend an inordinate amount on something just because other people do?

My in-laws have a higher net worth but are big spenders.  I expect to inherit $0.  They will find a way to spend $300k a year on elder care and swear it’s necessary.  [/quote]

No, my parents are not big spenders. At all. hHeir house is paid off and if they were able and self sufficient they could easily have lived off 50k per year and been comfortable.

We, the children and POAs, are the ones choosing to spend their money on good elder care rather than saving it for our own inheritance. Since the money is there, we are spending it on THEM. Not saving it for ourselves. I guess some people whose parents have millions would instead let their parents sit in wet diapers and not be turned or changed enough so they inherit more. Our parents raised us better than that.

There are two of them. It's easy to spend 150k per person on at home 24-7 elder care. Through an agency you tend to pay 25 to 35 dollars per hour. Do the math. During the day we need two people because my parents are so disabled. We are all mostly busy with careers - which were made possible by the fact our parents sent us through college and grad school. So yeah, we are not going to stingy with their care and leave them alone in their house to sit in wet diapers or fall.

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Nope.  You’re just big spenders.  You’re spending obscene amounts of money unnecessarily. [/quote]

You don't know what the f*** you are talking about. Have YOU ever had to take care of two parents at home using documented, on the books caregivers with the parents both physically disabled and have Parkinsons's and AZ?

Stop being an ass to me.  Taking care of disabled people with dementia is hell.[/quote]

I wish I had your problem with money.  I took care of my mil with early onset dementia.  I had to quit my job because we could not afford care on my salary and it was a nightmare as she could not be left alone.  After a few years the only option was a really bad Medicaid nursing home.  Do you know what it’s like to visit someone you live with unexplained bruises and no way to move her or get better care.    Try living without your kind of money.  Of, not to mention a child who needed daily therapies for years due to delays.    Yup, it must be terrible paying caregivers to do what I did.  [/quote]

I have done that. It is incredibly awful. And hard. However, this thread is not about people who cannot afford elder care. This thread is about people who expect to inherit millions. Or a substantial amount. If your parent had had millions, would you have stuck them in a cheap, bad nursing home? Or would you have used those millions to take care of them in a quality way? Basically, what do you have spent your parents money on your parents? Or would you have given your parents worse care to save money? A good child would use their parents money taken care of their parents, not hoarding it for their own inheritance[/quote]

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