Reply to When did you realize that your parents didn't care about you?

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[quote=Anonymous]This is a weird anecdote but stay with me:

I grew up in a hoarder household, and usually there was not a space where we could chill because there was stuff everywhere. We also didn't really have meals and my mom didn't really cook; I do remember her making crepes once and buttered rice another time, but I feel like that sort of ended when I was in upper elementary. I ate a lot of raw top ramen and Mac and cheese that I made myself (and sometimes even bought myself). My mom also yelled at us constantly, and seemed to get angry at us for everything.

Once, her friend's husband went to prison, and my mom babysat their daughter. My mom cleaned off a space on the floor for her to watch TV, and bought her a roast beef sandwich from Arby's and a canned Hawaiian Punch. While this girl was watching the show, she kept wiggling around her can of Hawaiian punch and a lot of it spilled. When my mom saw it she was furious and yelled "who did this?" I told her what happened, and she looked calmly at the girl and said in a really nice voice, "we need to be careful and not spill, okay sweetie?"

I asked my mom why this girl got the sandwich and why she didn't get yelled at, and my mom said in this angry voice, "her dad is in PRISON. Yours is not!" This happened several more times, where my mom treated kids from worse home environments better than she treated us. In a therapy session my mom basically said that we shouldn't complain about anything because we had a childhood that was much better than hers. She did a lot of messed up things but if we said anything we were told that we were entitled and didn't even deserve what we had.

I am sort of okay with this all now, I feel like she did her best and she is really just too mentally ill for our relationship to be good and I'm okay with the distant and yet friendly thing we have going now. [/quote]

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