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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. Thank you all for weighing in again and your questions. Our income is about even and won't be getting much in the way of child support but he is going to pay split the daycare/health expenses. (2 youngest in inexpensive daycare, 1 will be entering kindergarten next year)

It's possible he would agree to a payment plan... I may need to resort to that. But I am loathe to stay financially beholden and tied to him for various reasons including that this becomes a point of coercion and control for him. This is why I'm in a rush to financially separate cleanly (not assume the loan or stay under the joint mortgage, etc). [b]While legally we are doing this "amicably" it is very much not amicable emotionally or psychologically.[/b]

Interesting idea to try to cash out more for myself... I could potentially do that. I just saw the appraisal and they oddly appraised the home super high. But then the monthly payments would go even higher... [/quote]
Do not leave him on the mortgage. [b]If he has controlling tendencies[/b], a higher interest rate is worth not being tied financially to him. It’s a leap of faith but will be worth it in the end.[/quote]

Not to be harsh, but why did you have 4 children with a man who causes emotional and psychological harm?  Did you have any indication of this before the 4 children were born?[/quote]

I doubt they are all his. One is in college and two are in daycare ....[/quote]

What? My sibling has a 26 year old and a 10 year old, with two kids in between, all with the same spouse.[/quote]

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