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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have a family wedding coming up (not immediate family) that we are expected to attend. The costs are as follows:
$800 flights (these are the cheapest flights - it’s a destination-y location 
$600 hotel (block is $300/night), plus approx $100 for airport Ubers
$200+ childcare (no kids allowed)
$300+ clothing (couple has requested specific formal attire)

So altogether it adds up to $2k, which is almost half of our travel budget for the whole year. Is a gift really expected or would a thoughtful card suffice? I feel like a gift below $100 is almost worse than nothing.

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Ignore the clothing request and wear what you own.  This is not a show playing on Broadway, a HS auditoreum, or the Kennedy Center Opera House.  The DH can wear a dark suit- tux is silly.  It might not be a destination wedding for the couple and some guests but all weddings are destination weddings for some guests.  Hence it's rude to expect attendance on Fri events, book a venue for times that prohibit Saturday AM/early PM travel, expect attendance on Sunday brunches when flights are cheaper in the AM.

If your parents expect you all to attend ask them to pay for it.  If they can't or won't pay, go alone on a Sat [no time off] and tell them to get a 2 queen room and you get 1 of the beds.  Give $75 or a 50-100 registry item.  You are overthinking this.

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