Reply to Mom speaking to child in another language during playdate

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I do this all the time and did with my three kids. I don’t speak to my children extensively during play dates except to offer a quick direction or two. [/quote]

Yes exactly...

It is extremely hard to raise a bilingual child in the US. If a parent makes exceptions and speaks to the child in the majority language when they are in public, then this has a very disruptive effect on the relationship and kids will most likely start responding to the parent not in the target language. Everybody has different goals for their children's bilingualism and that is perfectly fine, but if you want your child to have a high level of fluency, you can't just switch to the community language every time you leave the house or are in public. Also, it subconsciously teaches the kids that your language is not as important or is something to be embarrassed about. We do OPOL and my DH always speaks to the kids in his language and my fam is perfectly fine with it and it really is fine. DC playgrounds - DH doesnt give a crap what people think about what language hes speaking and most people want their kid to hear him speaking his language anyway. We are in a community with lots of bilingual families and the parents that switch to English in public do not have kids kids that respond to them in their language - that is the honest truth.[/quote]

Some parents prioritize early bilingualism at all costs.    Other parents prioritize raising children with basic manners.

Everyone's got choices. [/quote]

No you chose self consciousness and self hate over family
Relationships and being able to communicate in heritage/native languages. All the rationalization in the world doesn’t change that.[/quote]

No, I choose teaching my children basic manners and social mores over someone else's rude family.    Speaking a language other's don't understand when you are socializing with them is rude.   All the "rationalization" in the world doesn't change that.[/quote]

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