Reply to If you come from a FUNCTIONAL family, why resent/dislike people from dysfunctional families?

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Reply to "If you come from a FUNCTIONAL family, why resent/dislike people from dysfunctional families?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don't underestimate how destructive and toxic dysfunctional people can be. I had two close friends, one in middle and high school and one in my 20s-early 30s, who were truly terrible for me. Both children of alcoholics, they were addicted to drama, created scenes, and [b]continually berated me for not being a good enough friend. [/b]I am a people pleaser by nature and I can see now how I enabled their behavior by validating them over and over. It makes me feel ill when I remember how I would try so hard to fill the voids in these women's lives and how I thought it was normal to be whipsawed between having so much fun and then having the rug pulled out from under me. I can see this so clearly now, but had no idea at the time that this kind of relationship wasn't normal in any way.

As a result, I am sympathetic to people's challenges but stay far away from engaging with damaged people. I also counsel my own kids to have healthy boundaries and to recognize that abusive behavior can exist in plenty of relationships, not just romantic ones. Would I ever say nasty things like "mentally ill people should be locked up"? Of course not. But I'm not here to help you work out your issues or let you bring all your negativity into my life. Save it for your therapist or your support group.[/quote]

See, in my experience, it's the people who consider themselves to be from "functional" households, in touch with their emotions, constantly receiving endless validation and unconditional love that tend to do that.  They tend to forget that other people don't exist to attend to their needs  and support the endless navel gazing.[/quote]

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