Reply to If you come from a FUNCTIONAL family, why resent/dislike people from dysfunctional families?

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Reply to "If you come from a FUNCTIONAL family, why resent/dislike people from dysfunctional families?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Study Dr Ramani on YouTube.

I gray rock people who are perpetually dysfunctional regardless of if they have come from functional or dysfunctional families.  This is to save my own sanity. I am an empathic and kind person. I am a magnet for dysfunctional people. I am still good for 1 good listening session for 10 minutes only. [/quote]

This sounds dysfunctional to me. I’m going to give people what I can and set boundaries where and when needed. But I’m not going to declare “only one 10 minute listening session” to a friend in need or a family member struggling. People aren’t widgets and life shouldn’t be transactional. But you do you. [/quote]

Saying, "[b]I can only handle this for 10 minutes" IS a boundary.[/b] Those of us who have been sucked into the void of endless hours of counseling others understand perfectly. Some people will never, ever get enough of your time if you continue to give it. If that's not you, then great! My mother was so kind and giving of her time to her various broken friends and a deacon at her church where she literally worked to help people try to get their lives together. After she passed away, her friends would call ME trying to talk about their various problems. No thanks; I have enough going on in my own life.[/quote]

Do you set a timer? Do you let your “friends” know from the onset they better keep it under 10 or you’re walking away / hanging up? Or maybe you charge a retainer fee … every minute over 10 is $$$. You sound like a real peach. Hopefully, your “friends” don’t treat you in this callous way when you have a personal tragedy, struggle, worry, or dilemma. Hope you are always keeping it light and fresh with your highly functional friends.

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