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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here's how it works, when you have comingled assets and are not living paycheck to paycheck:

You have shared credit cards. Shared savings. Shared investments. You pay for stuff when you need to. If you're going to buy something discretionary, and you know it's expensive (and you know, don't act like you don't), you go to your spouse and say, "Hey, I think I'm going to buy [x], do you have any issue with that?"

"How much is it?"

"$[y]"

"That seems reasonable"

or..

"Are you sure we need that right now? We were planning to repair the deck this summer"

or..

"Why don't you spend the extra money to get the better version, so we're not buying it again in two years"

Outside of that, we also discuss investment strategy. "How much do you think we should put into the funds this month?" "Do you think we should put more into the emergency fund?"

Neither of us look at every line item on the bank statements. Could we? Sure. But there's not someone snooping over every purchase. It's there, no one is hiding anything, and no one is untrusting of the other. Around gift-giving time we will say, "Hey, don't look at the XYZ statement" because a line item may give a clue about a gift purchased for the other spouse.[/quote]

Except for something big, I don't discuss what I'm buying.  I just buy it and sometimes tell my husband, sometimes not.  Something big if I don't want to buy but really want, he'll do it or I'll send him an email with exactly what I want as a "gift."

Except if there is an ex and child support, its absurd to be that petty and controlling over money assuming there are no money issues.[/quote]

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