Reply to Husband doesn't believe his behavior is abusive

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't think this is abusive.  It's just totally unnecessary and not good parenting.[/quote]

He sounds like an immature ass and a terrible dad, but I wouldn't call these examples abusive.

I also wouldn't stay in a relationship like this.  Behavior doesn't have to be abuse to be unacceptable.  [/quote]

A lot of people don’t understand what emotional abuse is. It can be hard to define. But maybe you should read about it and try to understand it before deciding that OP’s examples aren’t abusive which you obviously don’t know what you’re talking about.[/quote]

I run cold.  If DH opened all the windows on a cold day and I went around shutting them and then he called me abusive for it, I'd laugh myself silly.  I have to tell my DD(3) multiple times a day that I can't do things with her because I have to work, and it bums her out, but it's also true.  If she were older I would make the connection between my working and us having a house - that's not abusive it's reality.

The point is the worst examples OP can come up with (shutting windows, not leaving work early for a sport event) just aren't that big of a deal.  It's not clear whether her DH is trying to joke or trying to frighten his kids, and the kids' reactions seem over the top, and that OTT-ness seems to be actively encouraged by OP.

Like I said: I wouldn't be in a relationship like this.  But the way you guys sling "abuse" around OP's DH could come here with the same facts and tell a story about how his spouse is ignoring his temperature requests and hyping up the kids to guilt him about having to work at a job, and if he gender-flipped the post you'd tell him he was being abused and gaslighted too.[/quote]

Are you really this dense? It’s not about closing the windows or not going to the practice. It’s what he SAID. That’s what emotional abuse is.[/quote]

Borderline personality disorder. Look it up. The OP's DH plays a good victim but is so crazy dramatic. I'm a woman who runs cold too but man, I don't go around making stupid threats. [/quote]
Oh, pulease people. Can't you see that OP is a narc? Her description of her kids reaction and how she swoops in to save them is the tipoff. Case in point:

"DD then got very worried about H getting his work done so we wouldn't become homeless... 
I was able to stop them from getting upset by quickly saying haha daddy's kidding. He'll eat later."
 
Lol[/quote]

Ding ding ding this person above got it right. He has a personality disorder and therapy will not likely help him.

The things this POS are doing and saying are abusive and this is just one little post. Imagine all the other shit he does not in this little post.

It's king of amazing how people will sit and say his behavior is not abusive when it is horrible. Get this little girl outta there so she does not grow up and think it's okay to have someone talk to her like that.[/quote]

A personality disorder??  :lol: Something tells me he's sick of his wife's shit and he's checked out. He's irritable, not mental.[/quote]

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