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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]And before you say "then you should've divorced if you didn't feel loved and respected", I didn't see why I should upend either of our lives when everyone was getting what they wanted. During my affair was probably the happiest time in my marriage for both of us because I wasn't harassing him to love me and he was free to immerse himself in golf and computer games. Until several years passed and I realized my initial lust for my AP hadn't subsided...[/quote]

You get that this is the definition of selfish, right?  The fact that you can look back on this event after having had time and space to process and still defend yourself without any ownership of how this could have played differently, with acknowledgment of the pain you caused your husband (and maybe kids and your AP’s spouse and kids), shows you are very broken.  You admittedly didn’t decide to “upend” things until you knew you had a soft place to land.  Nowhere in any of your posts do you ever address your ex’s feelings and the pain you caused him (I doubt he agrees that you loved him like a brother - families don’t usually crap on each other like that).  Your complete focus is on you, your feelings, and what you are entitled to. Your current DH should be on the alert because if/when things are not all unicorns and rainbows, you are primed to cheat again.  [/quote]

You aren't going to convince me to feel guilty over hurting someone who hurt me for decades first and was given countless opportunities to stop.  Nope.[/quote]

And yet you are still married to him.[/quote]

I think this poster is with the AP now and ended the marriage[/quote]

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