Reply to “The Harsh Reality of Gentle Parenting”

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just about everything being "child-led": I don't think that's a problem at all.

I think that when you make things all about what the child needs, it can relieve this huge burden. You can just focus on getting your kid what your kid actually *needs*, rather than trying to make your kid behave a certain way. Like, my child does not *need* to get good grades. What she needs is to learn to work and to figure this out for herself. So I offer help but her grades are her responsibility. I rarely spend any time helping her with school, and I think I have much more time to do fun things instead of checking parentvue every day.

Also it doesn't mean you have to be a doormat. In fact, kids need to be taught to not treat others like doormats. They need an example of somebody standing up for themselves, setting boundaries, and getting their own needs met. And I think the principles in gentle parenting that I have learned help parents do this in a really effective way. Parents need to deal with their own issues instead of just trying to make kids act a certain way. [/quote]

And by the way, she doesn't just naturally get good grades. She struggles a lot and got some terrible grades in 6th. But she learned things. She learned to ask her teachers and me for help when she needed it, she learned that she can do things like a big paper that she didn't think she would be able to do, she learned that she does best getting up early to work on something rather than trying to stay up late, and she learned how to keep track of assignments. So I feel like by centering her needs, I experienced less stress *and* she grew. [/quote]

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