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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I am a PP who posted earlier that we are also supporting our 25 year old DD.  She is also in medical school.  It sounds like your DD is taking advantage of your relationship, or she is letting her bf take advantage of you.  Have you considered giving your DD a fixed amount per month for groceries, etc.?  We pay our DD’s rent directly and give her a set amount for groceries/miscellaneous.  She does not have our credit card.  This allows her to make her own decisions, but with the reality of a (fairly tight) budget.  Hopefully, this is preparing her for real life, as she will definitely need to budget during residency, etc.[/quote]

This is the answer. You do not object to supporting her financially. That means accepting the way in which she chooses to spend your money. I would give her a stipend but let her know that she could always come to me to ask for help with unusual expenses. I would give her extra money if I felt the expense -- travel to professional event -- valid. If I did not find the expense -- ski vacation with boyfriend fully paid by her -- I would explain my reasons and refuse to pay.[/quote]

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