Reply to Angry at sister and BIL for getting pregnant again

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a relative like this and thankfully she did stop after her doc told her the same thing. She just complained about it a lot.

You can be angry but keep it to yourself. Other people's poor life choices aren't really your business.[/quote]

Uh, it became her business when they decided to enlist the help of her ill mother which will impact the entire extended family. The BIL’s extreme selfishness and the sister’s enabling affects everyone. The BIL’s lack of concern for his own wife has unfortunately rubbed off on her as evidenced by her lack of concern over her ill mother. Not to mention they’re both being extremely selfish to their young daughters, who need their parents, all because daddy couldn’t be happy with the two healthy kids he has and insisted that he needed a boy. Also, what kind of message will this send to the girls? That dad doesn’t think they’re good enough. Selfish and despicable.

I see one or three things happening here:

1. If the DH gets his wish and the new baby is a boy, who ends up being healthy without any long-term complications, he’ll be the favorite child and will end up damaging the girls even more.

2. If the DH gets his wish and the new baby is a boy, but ends up having long-term health problems along with the OP’s sister who will have to go through a complex surgery after the birth, the DH will resent his wife, OP’s sister, not just because he didn’t get the healthy boy he envisioned but because he’ll have to step up and help, including being the parent he hasn’t been to the girls as the mom’s attention will be split between 3 kids rather than 2, even more so when the third kid will have health problems that will sucking up most of her attention. Worse if she suffers from health problems herself because of it.

3. The DH’s wish is not fulfilled and they have another girl, leading to his resentment because of it as well as further resentment should the baby have health problems.

Their selfishness is bad for everyone involved. No one wins. [/quote]

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