Reply to Vent: “gift” of a trip that I don’t want and requires me to spend lots of money and time

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Reply to "Vent: “gift” of a trip that I don’t want and requires me to spend lots of money and time"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It amazes me that people on DCUM have such rich families they are disappointed the parents don't offer to pay for flights in addition to accomodations. I can't even imagine. [/quote]

The fact that they rented a big house is irrelevant if it costs OP $2500 in plane tickets to get there. What if I gave you a gift card for $50 to a store where the cheapest item is $200? That’s not really a gift. You either get nothing - and an annoyed relative - or you get something that you will enjoy - but perhaps not as much as the thing you were really saving that extra $150 for.

In this situation, I think the money is secondary to the time. Some people only get 2 week of vacation a year and look forward to having a week with just their spouse and kids. Even if the money isn’t a big deal, OP can’t make more time. She has to wait all year. Kids are only little for so many years and if you only get one vacation a year, it’s a big deal to be forced to give up a plan you’ve been looking forward to.

OP - if your husband has more vacation than you, I’d send just him and tell them you already have a trip booked with your only vacation time. [/quote]

This. This is basically telling someone to use a week of leave, pay for 5 plane tickets, and vacation in a place they don't want to go, but "we'll pay for your lodging."  I'd be annoyed too.

And the previous wedding analogy is terrible.  First, weddings don't require a week of leave.  But more importantly, weddings are invitations, not commands, to a larger group of people.  Here, the trip was postured as a gift, putting OP in the uncomfortable position of refusing a "gift."  Plus, it's just family, so it will undoubtedly create issues if OP refuses.  
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