Reply to Kind of Felt Uncomfortable Because of My Ethnicity On a Tour

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[quote=Anonymous][quote][b][i]... It doesn't matter whether the questioner thought you were [a racial slur] or were just...interesting...because of your ethnicity. All that matters is that in some part they viewed you as "different" from them. ... [/i][/b][/quote]

I agree with 22:52's comments (and unfortunately her mother's advise too.)  Most people who belong to the majority race of a society do not "get" what it feels like to be viewed different than everyone else based on the color of their skin.  That when you just begin to forget about your race (at work, at a party, at your child's school, etc.), your ethnicity is brought to attention; a slap whether the other person's intentions were racist, neutral or otherwise.

I don't think OP was over reacting to the "well" intentioned, but poor judgement, comments put his way.  OP was "neutrally" attending an open house at a potential school for his child, not thinking about his race nor ethnicity.  He was a father, like the other fathers, gathering information about a school for his child.  He's not thinking he's necessarily different than any other parent there (like most white folks who probably never have it enter their consciousness that they are "different" because of the color of their face).  For a moment he's just concentrating on the school, the people there, trying to be nice, trying to look put together and then out of the blue his ethnicity is brought up; again and again.  It's clear the teachers and staff don't see a father of a potential student, they see an Asian father of a potential Asian student.  On the surface it's all innocent and the teachers and staff feel enlighten by their comments, but they don't realize how in trying to welcome OP they made him feel very different.  22:52's mother was correct when she told her that white people at her private school may treat her like one of their own, but will alway view her as different.[/quote]

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