Reply to Dating for 4 months and he said "not ready" for relationship- I walked away, now what?

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Reply to "Dating for 4 months and he said "not ready" for relationship- I walked away, now what?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m a single (divorced) mid 40s woman and I also cannot understand what you want. You seem to have a lot of rules - but they’re vague. Like, from month 4 to month 12 you want him to be your “boyfriend” but he can’t meet your kids. So- you’re asking him to commit to you now but without knowing most of your life as he hasn’t met your children (and can’t for 8 mos because of another rule).

You seem very controlling- I’d walk too if someone came at me with all these rules [/quote]

OP: I want an actual boyfriend who calls me to say hi and who says goodnight when free and who, when we spend the night, wants to hang out the next day if we’re both free. 
[b]Who isn’t still on dating apps and keeping their options open.[/b]
Who makes future plans and thinks of fun stuff to do together. [/quote]

Perfect thank you! This isn’t your guy.

Ps- I don’t call anyone either. I’m a busy lady. I’d run if someone needed me to call them twice a day. Again- these are all the wrong things to focus on. That makes me think that YOU are the one who sounds clingy, needy, and in no way ready for a relationship. Why not become that person for yourself first, so you aren’t as needy when you do meet the right person?[/quote]

I, too, think OP sounds kinda needy.  If they see each other 2-3 times a week I can't imagine there would be much need for (daily?) calls.  Seems like you could do most of your talking when you're together in person since you see each other frequently.

The bolded would give me pause if it's true and makes me question whether they are actually exclusive.  I guess unless he just hasn't bothered to delete his profiles but maybe you could just ask about that.  You said he readily agreed to being exclusive so if that's true presumably he'd be willing to delete the dating profiles.  [/quote]

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