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[quote=Anonymous]I think this would be a great setup, and this is coming from someone who was a SAHM to kids with the exact same age spacing. The only real difference is that we also moved cross country when the youngest was a newborn, but I guess in a way that's a similarity because I was also in the boat of trying to make new friends.

I don't think it would be weird to join a baby group with your third. I think it would be a great use of time with your nanny, since she can keep the other two busy/active while you get a little time to sit around with sweet non-mobile babies. Just don't let yourself become "expert mom" since it's not your first time at the rodeo.

Are your big kids in 1/2 day preschool? I'd highly recommend doing that if you aren't already. The closer to your home the better... and it will be easier for you to connect with other parents if it is a 1/2 day program and not full day.

In terms of making friends, I'd probably choose to keep the nanny separate from the playdates you might have with the older kids rather than having all 5 of you show up to a park playdate.

Another great thing about your nanny situation would be the ability to be flexible after a kid class. So if people are going to a playground after kindermusik, you don't need to run home to put the baby down for a nap.

Looking ahead to elementary school, my biggest recommendation is that you live within walking distance to the school. You'll be more connected to the community and it's much less of a hot mess to get your group there/back if you can walk.

The one other thing I'd consider if I were you is to see if your nanny could work at least one day to include putting the kids down. I personally would get myself out of the house during that time. You could meet up with a friend or take yourself to dinner or, I don't know, just read a magazine sitting in your car quietly. Anything to preserve a little of that time for yourself.

In terms of holding on to who you are... not going to lie, that's tough. I'd recommend finding a hobby. This may sound insane because I'm sure you have very little time. But even if it's like ... houseplants. Read about them. Find a podcast and learn more about them. Have your routine where you take care of them. This can obviously be watercolors or photography or woodworking or learning a new language or whatever appeals to you. Just SOMETHING that is non mom or wife-related. It doesn't really matter what it is. [/quote]

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