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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP I am not going to read all the responses but I wanted to say I was in a similar situation. 
The way it ended is he finally realized what his daughter was like and only pays for her college now (not too expensive in Europe).
Meanwhile we are getting divorced (for other reasons) and he barely spends on our son who he sees every weekend and therefore thinks he fulfills his fatherly obligations. He does pay child support but barely anything beyond that. 
In your situation, I would come up with a total of household/shared expenses including the kid expenses and ask for half from him. The rest he can spend on his daughter.
Also you are very lucky she doesn’t visit at least.

[/quote]

I would never marry a man with kids. Seen it firsthand in my own family.  Second marriages fail because of kids from the first marriage. Reading some of the responses here confirms my point. I have seen this with colleagues too and how their kids come second (not just financially)  because the "first family" manipulates. Heck we saw it in the White House last year!! . They know how to get what they want and treat step moms like dirt. As another post said be happy you do not have to see her.
Don't get a joint account he will probably use it on the elder one. The older she gets the more she will ask for and it will only cause further problems. Step DD will probably see the baby as competition for resources. [/quote]
Well to be fair my marriage failed for other reasons, not because of my ex’s daughter, as I mentioned above. 
But of course it’s better to marry someone with no kids. 
The interesting thing is that we are on good terms with her now. She harbors a lot of resentment toward her dad. So buying nice things doesn’t make one a good dad... not always at least. [/quote]

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