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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My sister was emotionally and physically abused by her husband. She had an affair that gave her the confidence to leave. I think it was not only justified but necessary.  Assume people other than the Taliban and the anti-cheating fanatics on here would agree[/quote]

And if he found out he would have killed her.0[/quote]

He did and he didn't, but thanks for trying to shame her, Mr. Taliban.[/quote]

Come on.  About the riskiest thing you can do is get caught cheating if your spouse is a psychopath, physically abusive.  She’s lucky she didn’t get caught and got out.  But, yes, he’s awful and I would still have left before that.  Didn’t she confide in yiu about the abuse?  Didn’t you try to help her?[/quote]

I knew about the emotional abuse but not the physical until she divorced. She was too embarrassed to share that part and I would have intervened. I tried to help her leave before but she had zero confidence, had gained weight, and saw herself as someone not worthy of love. I really think her affair helped her see herself in a better light.[/quote]

This was me too. The affair was my only source of strength. He made me feel loved and valued. It was only when the affair ended that I felt the full impact of being alone, and that hurts like hell.[/quote]

I'm sure his wife hurts like hell after finding out a man she gave unconditional trust to, had an entire life and children with, was banging you.  That pain is visceral and causes severe trauma, especially as she tries to piece together all of the times he was with you when he said he was somewhere else.

Nope.  You get zero sympathy for your pain as you were part and parcel of another woman's.[/quote]

I'm sorry I must have missed where they said that the guys were married. Oh no that's just you projecting so you can be the perpetual victim wallowing in her own misery because her husband cheated on her. [/quote]

I haven't read a single thread on this post where the married affair woman's AP was single.  This thread was the first that anyone has claimed he was single.  In all the multitude upon multitude of women cheating threads they were banging married men.  It's statistically a minority, particularly given the ages of these married women.  The pool is just not that large with kids and 40+.[/quote]

Who said women have to sleep with men the same age or older? That sounds very patriarchal. I know one guy who lost his virginity at the age of 17 (which is legal in his state) to a 39 yo married woman. Another single guy told me he once had a casual sex encounter with a woman and then found out she was married. Also think about Macron and his wife (she was 40+ married and he was her student). I'm not saying any of the above is justified. But just to point out how narrow is your view that married women have to affair with married men.

I had secret crushes on three guys over 9 years of marriage. All three were younger than me; two out of the three were single guys. One of the single guys actually reciprocated my feelings; we just never took a step further to act on it. Judge it as much as you like. When women can be independently wealthy, they don't need to go for older, financially stable guys like in a traditional patriarchal society. Younger guys are physically attractive in older women's eyes just like younger women are in old guys' eyes.[/quote]

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